Chodesh Tov! Today begins Chodesh Adar Bet, the regular Adar. That means, for those of you who live outside Jerusalem and a few other walled cities, two weeks from yesterday is Purim. Those of us living in these cities celebrate Shushan Purim two weeks from today. Some of us newer immigrants who miss two-day Yom Tovs have two days of Purim. We plan to go to the Gush to our son Alan for the celebrations in the Yishuv on Sunday, join them for their Seuda, and return to Jerusalem in time to hear the megillah Sunday nite. We will be having our Seuda Sheini on Monday with some new, and some old friends. I am hoping to put together a special “Purim Torah” if I get enough submissions, so please email you submissions to me (firstname.lastname@example.org).
Now, back to our regularly scheduled commentaries, et al.
Dumb and Dumber
Tomorrow, March 8, is also my birthday.
-Dry Bones- Israel’s Political Comic Strip Since 1973
Google flips Android kill switch, nukes evil apps After removing 50 or so rogue malicious apps from its official App Market, Google went a step further, remotely deleting the dangerous software from the phones of users who’d downloaded them.
U.S.: Jewish Student Sues UC Berkeley over Muslim Assault A Jewish student attacked for supporting Israel is suing UC Berkeley for allowing a “dangerous and threatening” campus environment.
Crane Operator Refuses Eviction Job Police thought they were ready to evict Jews from a small town near Jerusalem, but forgot about the crane operator – who refused the job.
The GOP may have to choose between two women – Sarah Plain and Michele Bachmann – for presidential candidate. Bachmann: Back Israel or be cursed.
Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to
celebrate their 40th anniversary.
Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces,
“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our
engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency
landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be
able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be
rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives.”
Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the
An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks, “Esther, did we pay our
charity pledge check to Beth Shalom Synagogue yet?” “No, sweetheart,”
Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, “Esther, did we pay
our United Jewish Appeal pledge? “Oy, no! I’m sorry. I forgot to send
the check,” she says.
“One last thing, Esther. Did you remember to send a check for the
Synagogue Building Fund this month?” he asks. “Oy, forgive me, Abie,”
begged Esther. “I didn’t send that one, either.”
Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest hug and kiss in 40 years.
Esther pulls away and asks him, “So, why did you kiss me?”
Abe answers, “They’ll find us.”